1) People judge others by their actions. This means you are being judged by the perceptions you create with your words and actions. For example, if you act angry, even though you feel otherwise, you will be judged as being hostile. If you sound helpless, even though you feel otherwise, you will be judged as being ineffective. Thus, choose actions and words that convey the impression you want to make.

2) People judge themselves by their intentions. Thus, acknowledge that the other person's actions or words are correct and proper (as seen by that other person). Even when someone's behavior appears completely absurd, that person most likely believes it is justified.

3) Everyone deserves courtesy and respect. Diplomacy gains more than hostility. It is always the best way to begin a dialogue. After all, no one has ever had to apologize for being courteous. When you treat others with respect, you set

4) Everyone has valuable ideas. Everyone is an expert in some area. Everyone has unique talents. A leader helps other people excel at expressing their ideas.

5) You can accept anything without agreeing with it. Thus, acknowledge amazing requests with statements such as:

"That's an interesting idea."

"That's a novel request."

"What an intriguing question."

6) Realize that you can always learn more about the other person's needs, priorities, and situation. Ask questions. Seek solutions. Think positive. Quick reactions often lead to apologies. Start by being thoughtful and seeking to understand fully.
About the Author

Steve Kaye helps leaders hold meetings that produce results - fast and with everyone's participation. He is an IAF Certified Professional Facilitator, author, and speaker. His facilitation and workshops create success for everyone. Call 714-528-1300 for details. Visit http://www.stevekaye.com for a free report.